i am the dot, dot, dot
the eternal placeholder
the lips you run to when hers aren’t close enough
the dotted line after the colon
the friend.
i am where there riverbed ends
the surrogate
the almost doesn’t count
the better luck next time
the fool …read more » »
…i dreamed of burgers. cleanse over!
at least i didn’t just totally delete the cleanse entry the next day like i was tempted to do. who wants to come off as a failure? LOL. but i figured…i’d leave it up to show the world i tried.
kinda.
and the cleanse really does work well (for some people).
but yea… not this time. maybe next time i’ll think twice before posting about my next innovative 10-day lose weight drink this cleanse.
but probably not 
…and not just any burger. a whiskey bbq cheddar burger complete with lettuce, tomato (thinly sliced please), and onion straws – hold the mayo – from red robin. mmmm… mouth just watering thinking about it. only one problem tho. i can’t eat a burger. i can’t even eat the bottomless steak fries that come with it. nor the freckled strawberry lemonade. not the lettuce, not the tomato (thinly sliced), not even the mayo i didn’t want in the first place. why you may ask? because i am on a cleanse.
…enter the strings…
the master cleanse. otherwise known as the lemonade diet. and tho in reality this is no diet – you do lose poundage. added benefit for me, but still…
i guess it doesn’t help that me and my room mate (who’s fault it is that we’re in this mess in the first place) started this cleanse yesterday morning and we somehow, someway still ended up at red robin last nite eating (yep, you guessed it) a whiskey bbq cheddar burger with lettuce, tomato (thinly sliced), onion straws – hold the mayo – and steak fries… don’t judge me. …read more » »
people don’t write anymore. we text. we email. we i.m. but… we don’t write. it’s like to pick up a pen and just compose falls somewhere between sending the mortgage in on the 1st (instead of closer to the 15th) and actually achieving a new year’s resolution – nice in theory, but ain’t gonna happen. think about it – when was the last time you received a letter in the mail? (and i’m not talking about a ‘you may have just won $1,000,000′ letter) but a real, bonafied, jill scott “you just ran across my mind” letter? for me, it’s been ages.
but to be fair, it’s been quite a while since i’ve written one too. and as a writer…i’ll admit – that’s pretty sad. sure, i’ve sent a few hallmark cards or even an empty card that i jotted a few lines in, but a real, dated and signed letter? it’s been a minute. and if the writer’s aren’t even writing letters, the flowery stationary cowering in the corner hasn’t got a chance.
but i do believe there’s something about receiving a letter that is truly orgasmic. something that makes you feel good involuntarily. something that makes your insides smile but requires nothing on your part but going to the mailbox.
I live in Philly. I shop in NY. But I hate driving in either city. Amtrak and Greyhound cost too much, so I take the “Chinese bus” from Philly’s Chinatown to NY’s Chinatown. It’s $20 roundtrip. It’s prompt. It’s efficient, but it’s torture.
It’s 7:00 a.m. I need coffee (that obsession is a whole other discussion). I hand my $20 to the obnoxious woman behind the windex-deprived bullet-proof glass. She hands me my ticket. I go to walk away. She screams, “don’t go nowhere. 10 minute.” I chose not to argue, Wawa’s right at the corner and this will not go well if I don’t have a 16 oz. Kona/Vanilla Cream coffee mix, black, with two Splenda. My caffeine fix in hand and duffle on my shoulder, I head back to the bus.
you don’t remember the password, that’s how. even worse – you have no recollection of ever setting up a password!
so i’m at my new job, and for the time being our official work laptops haven’t come yet. so… we’ve been working off of our personal machines. around 10:03 i realize i’m late for my 10:00 meeting, so i rush up to go join the rest. but not so fast – office etiquette is to always lock your screen lest someone sneak into your cube and read your gmail. so…i hit the wonderful little ‘crtl’ and ‘L’ key combo and run to the meeting. twenty minutes later, i plop down in my ikea’s finest to get back to work and alas… it tells me “this computer is in use and can only be unlocked by the systems administrator.”
Ok…so I am a proud owner of a 3G 8 GB iPhone. I know what you’re thinking…”big deal!” Right?! Well, for me, a technologically-challenged, easily impressed and user-friendly application-loving consumer, it is and remains a big deal. It’s fine, don’t admit it, but you know its a cool phone. From the pages of free applications we effortlessly flip through to the envied 3G technology (which I don’t truly understand, but apparently is also very awesome!), the iPhone is the best phone everyone loves to hate.
And just why has everyone turned on the iPhone? Are we forgetting the hype surrounding its launch. I mean, never mind the line where we stood for 2 hours that stretched down the block, around the corner and a little pass “ridiculous” just to purchase it. The same slave march we took amidst obnoxious passerby questions like, “is this a free cheese line?” What do you say to such “clever” …read more » »
…yea, i know. it sounds crazy. but, it’s the truth. had it not been for the scratchy throat, achy back, throbbing head and, dare i not forget, the running nose – i may have never stumbled upon the greatest thing since sliced bread (i always wondered what that expression meant). puffs kleenex with vicks. that’s what it meant.
that’s right – i am paying homage…to a tissue. and i’m not ashamed. cause this is not just any tissue. this thing is laced. somehow, someway – they managed to combine vapor rub, lotion and cotton into a masterpiece. one that’s been brushing against my stuffy nose all day long. literally.
it all began that cold, wet, icy evening after a long day at work, and an even longer commute home. the poor little roll of toilet tissue i had stolen from my bathroom only the day before (i was out of kleenex) was dwindling down to nothing as i cursed the charmin commercial that promised it was 2 rolls in one. 2 rolls my butt. anyway… as i sneezed my way closer to the bed that was surely calling, i pulled into the cvs lot to claim some ‘get well’ items. i strolled thru the aisles picking up 2 cans of chicken noodle soup (it was buy one, get one free so i had to get 2), orange juice (altho i was mad they only had the little bottles – cvs should really consider carrying larger sizes), and we can’t forget the little ghiradelli chocolates with the caramel centers (mmm…i think i’ll blog about those next), i darn near forgot i had come in there for kleenex in the first place.
Hello! welcome to my blog.
